September 30th: Banks. Smooth.

Oh hi there. Fancy meeting you here.

There's a public holiday tomorrow and I must be the only twenty-something in Brisbane NOT having plans to get wasted for the evening. I lost my husband to "Borderlands", he even slept on the couch because he was "jet lagged", but I think he actually just wanted to play the game all night.

My first day at work was OK. My naive self posted a facebook status about how excited I was, to go back to work but honestly, 20 minutes into my shift and I felt like I had never left. The same old stuff. But I suppose...I have been doing it for SO long now that it wasn't very likely going to turn from "same old" into "super awesome", just because of a 17 day break. But ah well. It's not dreadful either so I can live very comfortably with that.

Talking about not being so superficial yesterday, and I am already outing myself as a hypocrite. I wanted to show you a few of the key pieces I got overseas, since fashion has been a very underrepresented topic on this blog, when it is such a big thing in my daily life.

I usually go crazy with buying all sorts of stuff but this time I actually made myself stop and think before I went to the register. Often I buy things because they are in fashion, not because I actually like them. I think that's quite a common problem, since every girl between 11 and 28 dresses practically identically here.
Over the winter months all I saw was knits and printed Lycra leggings, then there were (are) pastels, now it's going onto neon and brights and lace for spring/summer season. It seems all these people are so scared of not being stylish, they would rather disappear in a sea of  fashion trends, than put something on that isn't considered "in".

So when going overseas, I saw how much individuality there still was in terms of fashion. Yes, a lot of stuff might be considered "outdated" over here, but it's worn in such a charming and also extremely careless way, that it's just.. you know... OK? And people identify themselves with what they wear. You can tell the literature fans from the music fans from the car fans and so on. It's part of showing the world who you are, and not what look you're going for.
It's quite refreshing seeing people who don't read style blogs, don't go shopping for months at a time and don't care about kawaii nail art and Jeffrey Campbells.
It's a save world and a soothing experience to go to the mall and not having to try hard, to look good and impress anyone. I feel that there is such enormous pressure on people here to stay up to date with fashion and trends and make up and hair and what not, just to be able to feel comfortable when doing your fucking groceries.

That's why I decided to take a second look at everything I bought while being overseas, to decide whether these things are just appealing because they are trendy, or because they represent me. Some of the things were still impulse buys (cat ear headband, anyone?), but nothing more expensive than, say,  a Tenner was purchased without doing the old "what will it go with in my wardrobe, will this cut suit me, do I need this shiz?" check first. I feel like such an old lady now!!!

Alright, object number one was purchased after looking at and thinking about it for around a week, during our 3rd trip to H&M (and trust me, the third one wasn't our last one!!!):

College jacket with pleather sleeves, pocket details and collar with press studs. EUR 39.99
I blogged about this jacket ages ago (can't find the post but just have a browse if you want to). It's basically a rip-off of the Marni x H&M collaboration that happened earlier this year. I wore it to work already today. What can I say about it? It's warm, it's comfy, it's black and it has quilted elbow details. Case closed.

Patent pleather Satchel bag. Yes, this is a total Cambridge Satchel rip off but you know what? I paid EUR 24.99 for it so for my financial situation and the fact, that I am treating all my bags disgustingly disrespectful, this is simply a better option for me.
And it's time for some patent to finally make a comeback. I missed the shiny Sunday school look. Will be relying on this bastard for at least the rest of the year.

High waisted skinny jeans. EUR 39.95.
There's not much to add to these. I snatched the second last pair and they are ridiculously comfortable. Good for me, that after two washes the colour is already starting to fade around the top and pockets. I wanted to get a pair that had a washed look to it. And did I mention the 80ies butt they give me? Hahaha.



So there you go.
3 staples I purchased that I will be living in for the next twenty or so years. At LEAST! Haha...oh I wish I could sleep already. Going crazy like duh.

September 29th: Zombie mode

God, jesus.

I am a zombie.

Tried sleeping for 8 hours today, but ended up sleeping...what... 14 something?
It took me 6 hours just to get in the shower. Future is looking prosperous, people!

September is almost over and it hasn't been a very fruitful blogging month. Since January posting has become somewhat like brushing my teeth every day, but September really, really sucked. This girl has a dirty old mouth by now. Figuratively. I enjoy hygiene. Just to make things clear.

So what can you expect from now on? Well, I can't really tell right now. I am blogging daily, but the content..I don't know. I am trying to take a step back from the superficial at the moment and concentrate on a couple of issues of greater importance. Like, why are people more offended by being called ugly or fat than being called dumb or boring?

All throughout school I was called fat or ugly or both, but the only thing that really stuck with me all these years is when a particular young man called me boring. That was the most hurtful thing anyone's ever called me.

I talk to lots of young girls these days (yes, I know using this term makes me sound like an old hag) and they don't care if anyone calls them boring or dumb. They do, however, break out in tears if someone calls them unattractive.

So here's the thing. We can't deal with being unattractive, but we are happy to be unintelligent. What does that say about society? Shudders down my back...

But I am getting off topic (once again...)
In any way, make sure to watch this space again. There are still three months to go until the end of the year so bear with me and see what I've got up my sleeves. Who know, maybe I'll win the lottery and become a filthy rich arsehole and you can say: "Whoa, see that kunt. I read her blog when she was poor". Or something.

Now: Pretty picture!!!

   Oh Austria, you beauty!!!!

September 28th: Kittens everywhere

Hi! I am in Brisbane again.
Currently recovering from the flight of hell/jet lagging away like the little ladybug I am.

Ok, ok. There mightn't have been torrential rain or lighting, but the flight still absolutely sucked balls. The last two thirds, that is. Munich to Dubai was practically empty and we flew in an Airbus A380. Yep, that's the one with two levels, the bottom one solely intended for Economy Class. There are fake mahogany stairs that lead up to what I can only imagine as Nirvana. Beds, bars and...well....beds! What more do you need on a 21 hr flight?

I once was lucky enough to get a free upgrade from Economy to Business Class. Sure, you're still exhausted and smelly after a couple of hours, but there is no neck, back or joint pain, no waiting around for the person next to you to finish their meal/wake up all together so you don't pee yourself and no spew-worthy food.

Yeah...four meals in a row of "sweet and sour chicken" with some sort of a meaty salad. No, thanks. I am in a very dark place in terms of my digestion at the moment. Now that we've covered that, we'll move on to nicer things.

Or not. So, everyone who's ever boarded a plane with me, knows I get a bit nervous during turbulence. I don't freak out, but I am one of those people that grab onto their armrest and put both feet on the ground, as if that would make a big difference to the whole dying/staying alive - concept. Now, because of that nervous streak, I can't sit next to anyone that is even more nervous than I am. The girl sitting next to me, also a strong believer in the foot-on-ground/hands-on-armrest - method, turned out to be a bit of a psycho. Like....VERY nervous! And since for a whole hour before we landed in Singapore, turbulence was our ever-present companion, well...I had a pretty shit time! Worst part though was the landing. Never have I felt a plane bounce off the landing strip twice at full speed, then drift to the right and finally drop down like a moutherfucking rock! Girl next to me screaming, of course. At least Dan was having a jolly old time, laughing his butt off. At least the landing in Brisbane was soft as whipped butter...

September 24th: Can't catch a break

Hey there. It's me. I am not even going to announce that I am back because GOD KNOWS what is going to happen the next couple of days when we have to pack our bags, harden up and say good bye like grown up people (NO TEARS THIS TIME!) and travel around the globe. I might not want/be able to blog but I am definitely going to get back to blogging daily once I am back in Australia.

I can't catch a break at the moment, I am always driving somewhere/meeting somebody/buying something/eating something at the moment. The last full day here will be tomorrow and besides saying goodbye to both my Nanas (which, btw., is the hardest thing to do), my sister and a couple of close friends, I will have to fit in some laundry doing and packing. Mum and Dad are awesome so they organised for Dan and me to get a massage early morning on Wednesday before our flight. They are going to drive us to the airport too.
....

It's a good thing to come home from time to time. It clears my mind and makes me feel ambitious again. Sometimes I get a bit superficial and insecure, but seeing my parents being proud and my siblings being interested gives me such a boost. I have this urge to learn again, to make a difference. I can't quite put my finger on what I would like to do just yet, but there is an outline of a dream job on the horizon - considering I was totally clueless for the last three years about what I would like to do (with the exception of a completely naive dream of how great a job in journalism would be) this is a big old step for this girl right here.

Another thing I have been thinking a lot about is the way I consume. I couldn't help but notice how short my attention span has become. I am so incredibly bored with media and music and fashion, that all I do is consume more and more. That's one of the reasons why I am so slack with reading books. I start one, then jump to another one, then finish some and forget about others. The confusing thing is, that this is a way of doing stuff that I completely detest in my regular life. The way I work compared to the way I consume media are a complete contradiction. There is no system, no productivity or efficiency. I think the room for improvement is gigantic!!! When I went to the music shop today, I listened my way through some albums I was intending to buy. I was bored. (Ugh..The new "The XX". Fark. How disappointing.) Skipped through all the songs and couldn't find anything I really enjoyed or I thought was worth buying. So my question is: Is it me or is it media? Is there nothing enjoyable out there or am I just not paying enough attention? Or not paying enough attention to the good stuff?

Too many questions. I should start consuming less media, selling all of the things I bought but refuse to use and choose more critically what I read and look at online. Amen. And now I'm going to hop on instagram. H-Y-P-O-CRIT me.

Ok, gotta go now! :)
xxxxx

September 16th: Too much fun!

Sorry ladies and lads. I am just having too much fun right now. Well...since I am OFF the plane, that is. I am going to try to get back to blogging daily but to be honest I am kind of in the mood to enjoy every second I am here, drinking and eating delicious food and going through my old crap and you know..the usual goodness. So in case I shouldn't show up here in the next ten days be sure to watch this space for the next couple of weeks. There are going to  be a lot of photos to show and stories to tell. And if you are really keen to see what I am doing, just visit me on instagram :) I am bombarding my followers with food photos and drunkenly misspelled captions at the moment. It's fun!

I had a couple of dreadful hours up in the air on the way here, with people spewing next to me and food that reeked and tasted like arse, turbulence and lots of fart smell. After 22 hrs of traveling I was finally able to hug Mum and Dad, who picked us up from the airport at 9 pm on Thursday. Needless to say I was looking forward to bed but we were stuck in traffic for almost an hour, which resulted in us getting home at about 2 am the next morning. The jet lag that followed was horrendous, I felt like rocking the whole time and then came nausea and headaches and the usual shit (falling asleep during a conversation...). I think I am finally over it, with that probably being due to my hangover overpowering the other symptoms.

But you know what, before I get carried away here I just want to point out how extremely amazing it is at home. I am eating great food, tucking in on the desserts (sugar diet is on hold!), drinking preservative free beer and hugging my little old dog every spare minute. My parents, siblings and friends are absolutely great to me, bartenders at my go-to pub give me free drinks, I already saw an awesome live gig and it's only day three. We have ten days to go, with my Mum's big big birthday party (she's turning 50 next week! WOWZERS!) coming up, another couple of dinner dates and big shopping trips, and of course lots (LOTS!) of great foods and beverages to consume.

As for today I am happy to just lounge in the front yard, where it's quite frankly too beautiful to even grasp.
The weather is perfect, flowers are still blossoming, the grass is juicy and green and we can pick apples from trees and veggies from the garden.
We're surrounded by forests and there is even fucking deer running around. I am serious. This must be paradise! Aha.

I'll get some photos up definitely but for now, byeeee :)

September 11th: I'm BACK

I admit, this is a very clumsy date choice to announce my comeback as a daily blogger but you know...history shouldn't stop progress. Or something.

Anyway, I am dearly sorry for my absence. I don't even know myself what I have been doing the last 5 days. I just didn't feel like blogging. Might be, because I am quite (QUITE) excited about going overseas and every minute I have I am trying to either sleep, to make time go quicker, or do something silly like...cleaning. In fact, I am just about to head to work to get through my last 8 hours, then come home and start packing (the latest I have ever started packing for an overseas trip/LD flight).

The thought of the flight already makes my joints ache and I had to turn down my friends' advice to pop some Valium. The possibility of me turning into a cat-throwing Hulk-like psychopath is just too great.
Thankfully Dan got himself a packet of sleeping pills (not the crazy type) and has successfully tested them out last night. We might actually get to enjoy a couple of hours of induced coma this time. The only thing scaring me is the old "piss yourself in your sleep" situation. I hope I don't feel THAT relaxed. Although, at the thought of plane toilets 10 hrs into the flight my wee wee usually disappears into thin air anyway.


Waah, what am I talking? Clearly my itchy foot sole is distracting me here.

Ok my dear electronic friends. I am going to work now. For the last time. In two weeks. Whoo hoooo. I will post again tomorrow and will most likely show you my half empty suitcase (I am great with packing!) and then I'll be offline again for a day or so. We'll see how the jet lag goes and whether or not I'll be able to use my phone overseas (OMG, two weeks without instagram? WOOOOT??).

Until then, be nice and stay tuned. Love you xxxxx

September 6th: All I'm asking is for a little respect

I know I have been doing a lot of talking and less "fluffy" lately, but I am just having an epiphany at the moment.
Or not really an epiphany. I am just so sick of how men and women treat women in our society.

Every single day I am confronted with sexist and misogynistic behaviour, born in both male and female brains. It strikes me that so much of it goes completely unidentified by both genders. It's just a way of living. To call a woman a bitch, because she's slept with more guys than you have or because she refuses to stop and smile, when a seedy as guy yells out something stupid like "Baby, can I have your number". I am fed up and I will not stop talking about. Ever.


I walked into your favourite fast food restaurant after my late shift yesterday,  when I got yelled at by a 4WD-load of pubescent boys. They were driving past me, yelling out "I would fuck that".
That.

Leaving aside the fact that this is an absolute moronic thing to do and say to ANY human being, it really hit me how I wasn't even referred to as a person. I was referred to as THAT. An object.

I don't know if these boys are aware of what they are doing or how they are disrespecting me as a woman, as a person, as a human being. I don't think they are. In fact, these days I think people have become very insensitive to discrimination against women.
And to be honest, it's quite easy to loose track of what is discrimination and what isn't. Walk into a newsagent and you see misogyny everywhere. And yet it people greedily consume it like free french fries. 

My fifteen year old self probably would have taken the above statement as a compliment, no doubt about that. And I can't blame her. After all, according to media and our wrecked society beauty and attractiveness are the most desirable attributes of female existence. Adored by men, feared by women. The punchlines are infinite.
And as a fragile teenager you hoard this information and feed off it, because you are so damn confused about how to be ok the whole time. I read women's magazines (in fact, I consumed a lot of different trashy media), I tried to be like the women in the magazines and I didn't EVER think that any of this was wrong. In fact, I thought that was the key to being normal....

............

Dan and I watched Puberty Blues the other night. There was a scene where this absolute loser of  a teenage boy wants to have sex with a girl he calls "his girlfriend", but who he refuses to speak to or be nice or to stimulate her in any way. Besides "get your gear off", there isn't much conversation going on and he tries hard to get it on, but even with the help of Vaseline (OMG WHAT? MORON!!!) he can't enter and of course blames it on the frigid girlfriend. After I had made several comments on how disgusted I am with how little self-worth this girl has, Dan commented as follows "Why don't you eat some pussy you fucking loser!".
That's why I am married, I am part of a seemingly patriarchal institution and I can still call myself a feminist, because, frankly, my husband isn't a disrespectful moron. He's a real man.

Tomorrow: A post about jewellery! YAY! NO MORE READING :)

September 5th: Bits and bobs

Things on the web that made me smile today:

On Advanced Style:
This series by L'Oreal to celebrate the anniversary of their "Ellnet" hairspray called "Hairspray confessions". Let me just say that if I am only half as witty and there as Iris Apfel at 91, I will be thanking god too every morning.


More is more and less is a bore.  Iris Apfel. You are a legend.

On Musings of an inappropriate woman:

“He was the first man I’d met who wasn’t afraid of me.” 
- Hillary Clinton on Bill.

(I must add, that I feel kind of creepy having a photo of Hillary and Bill "Beardy" Clinton saved on my desktop)

Via The National

The headline: HOLLYWOOD ACTRESSES FED UP WITH FLUFFY INTERVIEW QUESTIONS
 An excerpt (but read the whole darn thing!)

 "While her co-star Robert Downey Jr got a complex question about his character’s narrative arc, Johansson was asked about her diet. This prompted her to ask Downey: “How come you get the really interesting, existential question, and I get the ‘rabbit food’ question?”"

"A prime example is an interview last month with Anne Hathaway, an actress whose beauty and slenderness have often been rather more elaborately discussed than her performances. When asked about her pre-filming diet by a male interviewer, she turned the tables by asking: “What’s the deal man? You look great ... are you trying to fit into a catsuit or something?”

" This month, the Spider-Man actress Emma Stone fielded a question from American Teen Vogue about turning from redhead to blonde like this: “People do always ask that. They ask who is my style icon, what’s the one thing that I can’t leave my house without. I’m always like: ‘My clothes!’ I can pretty much leave without anything. It’s fine as long as I’m not naked.”

She went on to point out to her co-star Andrew Garfield that “you get asked interesting, poignant questions because you are a boy”.

 About time someone did an article on this (damn, why not ME?). It makes me feel so incredibly angry how women get objectified, no matter WHAT profession they pursue. Even if you work in a lab and do cancer research you won't be appreciated as much as your male counterparts, if you aren't conventionally beautiful (and even then you gotta be lucky to be considered as equals). This is media manipulating every single one of us and trying to make us believe that as a woman it's all about being beautiful and attractive. This won't change, until women receive credit for their talents and achievements, rather than for fitting a size 0. I am sick of it and I am glad these women are starting to stand up for themselves. There is nothing "bitchy" or "arrogant" about not wanting to talk about your calorie intake, if you have just worked your butt off for a year to shoot a movie. How frustrated would YOU feel if everyone treated you like an idiot and gave more shits about your workout regime than your work? I am all team Scarlett. I want every woman to join team Scarlett. Educate yourself and learn to stand above all these numerous sexist articles and you will feel so much more content. The worst type of sexism is the one that is so incorporated in our daily life, it's hard to point your finger at it.

via Youtube.com
Rekindling my love for Lykke Li

September 4th: Enlightenment

via google. storm cloud

This article made me get goosebumps today.
You should read the whole thing but if you are short on time here are a few of my favourite quotes:

  Living means suffering, error, risking, giving and losing. This is how we postpone death. To me this represents freedom. To accept that life is a full spectrum of feeling and colors and that we must dance in the chaos, to dance through the range of the emotions that we are gifted as humans. This to me is freedom.

 I have felt in my personal life that freedom was graduating, or getting validation from a degree or certification, traveling, attracting a beautiful and loving partner or friend. While all of those things can bring you happiness, the dependency on them can actually rob you of your happiness.

 True freedom comes in accepting that you will never know it all and there is a certain surrender and peace in that.

I so often struggle with feeling like an underachiever and this really made me feel enlightened and content. I should stop beating myself up over things I don't have and appreciate the things I have. That doesn't mean I should stop trying to make the most of my time, but it does mean I should consider taking a step back and looking at what I have achieved and what I have become with pride. At least from time to time. Because you only live once.

via google. storm clouds are intimidating. and beautiful.

September 3rd: Rules

On my way home today I was thinking about why people invent rules and why other people stick to them.
I thought, if everyone driving in front of me did whatever they wanted to, they would cause a lot of pain to other people. But that's certainly not, why they stick to the rule. It's because they don't want to get hurt themselves. It's a completely selfish motive that makes people stick to rules. And I think that doesn't just apply to traffic rules, but to life in general.

People follow rules because that's the easiest way to keep oneself out of trouble and NOT because it's the easiest way to save other people from getting harmed. Our whole society is built on selfishness. Pretty disgusting, if you think about it.

Getting pretty deep on here. But you know what...since Eva Longoria is now in an advertising campaign for cat food, I am sure hell is about to freeze solid.




Oh and yeah, I have a slight obsession with Katy Perry at the moment. I LOVE this interview!!

September 2nd: Sunday Funday

SPRING IS HERE!
It's incredible how big an impact a few degrees and the sun has on my mood
and general mental state. I am a happy little chipmunk right now.
I am going overseas in 10 days. That might contribute to my happiness.
To say I am excited is an understatement. I have tingles in my toes and butterflies
in my belly!

Dan and I went on our usual Sunday date day this morning. We had a lot of stuff planned but we sorta got distracted and just ended up buying "The Big Lebowski" on blu-ray and then having the most DELICIOUS lunch ever. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Jackpot Noodles at West End. It's delicious. It's cheap. It satisfies my cravings for BBQ pork buns.
I was in such a good mood I broke my sugar abstinence and had some fried ice cream (wasn't that good) and a chocolate milk shake (wasn't good either). My guts hate me, I didn't sleep well and I, once again, got taught a lesson I already knew. Sugar is not good for your body. Ok. Note taken.

After lunch we made our way home and ended up in bed to watch above mentioned movie. I kinda just fell asleep and woke up, craving Kahlua. So much for hidden advertising. It even works on me when I'm unconscious.

Anyway, I decided to go all out and wear NO black clothes AT ALL. Felt very girly and extremely out of my comfort zone but I think I like it! What do you think?

 I finally got myself a great great bokeh app!!! So in love!

Dan took this photo of me outside our house. I am wearing Ally shirt and skirt and YES I have finally conquered the art of donut hair bun making. It's spring guys! I am so excited!!!

He only JUST escaped an attack by our mate sholphin. He is half shark, half dolphin - combining the best attributes of both mammal and fish. Needless to say he is one evil motherfucker.

I am currently trying (again) to get through Nabokov's "Lolita". It just drags on and it's so weird and twisted. Very off-putting.
BUT since my goal is to get through every Penguin book every published, I have no choice but to keep on pushing through!
Oh and for you who are wondering how my work out is going - it's going FANTASTIC! I am so stocked that I have stuck to it last week, since Dan was sick and had to skip 4 sessions. My abs are starting to REALLY show, my thighs and glutes are getting super firm. The only thing that's annoying is my arms are getting real big again. But I'll swap muscle for wobble any day.
It's super hard but the results are worth it.

KK. I'm out.

xxx

September 1st: WHOA where has the year gone?

Hey! It's September.
My Northern Hemisphere body rhythm is now telling me: "Rug up, bitch! Autumn is here!"
My Southern Hemisphere body rhythm keeps punching me in the face, going: "It's spring, silly! Show some leg, for crying out loud!". I will NEVER get used to that.

So yeah. Great things have happened since yesterday. Not.
Still trying to recover from all of my very traumatic work experiences yesterday.
Dan and I were mocking around when he randomly started yelling out "BLACK BETTY" and we collapsed onto the kitchen floor, weeing ourselves a little bit since we lacked muscle control because we were STUNNED from laughter.
I think  "BLACK BETTY" has the potential to become a little thing. Or a big one. Maybe a phenomenon!!!
What's your opinion on this? And most importantly will you spread the word?

BLACK BETTY?      via thechive.com

I have a whole 8 working days to count down until I board my plane to Austria. Already dreading the 26 hr flight but a woman's gotta do what she has to do. Then it's two weeks of bad behaviour and drunkenness with very little to no responsibilities. In fact, the only responsibility will be trying to wear pants most of the time. After giving it a bit of thought even THAT might be optional.


Oh Jesus. I just got side tracked.
By THIS:

someone throw that jumper in my face NOW!  via asos.com

Ah man...my attention span is zero right now.
I might just curl up now and leave this stuff to it.
Oh hey, and you should go and watch this movie!