November 14, 2013

ISABEL MARANT FOR H&M - What I would buy if I gave a f***

The title says it all. I can't deny having felt very excited about this collaboration at one stage, but the hype has hit saturation point and THIS horrifying tale, which gets me excited in a very bad way (read: Disgustingly over privileged sub-culture who fulfill no real purpose in society), made me un-like the whole spectacle and most of the collection.

There's something so inauthentic about fashion at the moment and it BORES me. The whole "white, straight, skinny, wealthy, privileged" concept is tedious beyond means and I cannot wait for 70 % of the fashion blogosphere to crash and burn. One day. ONE DAY. I just explained to myself why my bloglovin feed piled up to 300 + unread posts. Time to delete some of the airy fairy BS. Current sentiment: resentment.

Moving on to the collection - a lot of it is just fluff and poorly shaped silk pieces. Especially the skirts and dresses, usually a no-brainer for this butt-flashing lover, I'm not impressed with. Just typing these words made me feel like the wrath of the fashionistas is going to come upon me. The horsemen of the Apocalypse are trotting my way in fringed boots and oversized blazers.

At age 10 I went to visit extended family in Romania and, I kid you not, saw coats and pullovers at the Gypsy markets almost identical to the ones spotted in the Marant collection.
Some of the sweaters resemble those hideous Merino sweaters you can buy at any New Zealand Sunday farmers market. I'll make this observation a short and sweet one: WHY????
Like, I get it. Paired with the right outfit these pieces might stand out or be a uber-witty sarcastic ode to hipsters' parents' poor upbringing or something, but overall it's not a style I think anyone would rip off shop floors, if it wasn't for the label and/or expensive marketing campaign.

I'm not sure if I am the first to make this observation, but H&M sure know how to do designer collaborations REALLY well. And by saying that I mean they always, ALWAYS tend to bring out their own nifty little versions of the designer collections' best sellers about 6 months after its initial launch. For a third of the price. I mean it. Identical. That's what I call clever recycling. Of other people's brain juices, that is.

But, in all honesty, there are some pieces I wouldn't mind calling my own at some stage in my life, and if it's just to add some Parisienne finesse to my anglicized personality:

The Brigitte Bardot hooker hat had to be in my most wanted items. Paired with a pair of white embroidered jeans that scream "Marant" from two miles away. The fluffy knit with 3/4 sleeves can go with either the jeans or hooker leather pants (sarcasm aside the knee patch and overall detailing on these is divine), so can this white intricate knit (I'd wear this with black half-sheer stockings for a Nineties vibe). A metal scarf is on there too, because hey, it's a freaking metal scarf and I'm in the most humid part of the world I've ever been and the potential feels of it on my skin just seems like the coolest thing right now. Bad puns in every post people. You can't escape them. I also had one of these thin metal-y scarves back in 2004 and paired it with the most horrendously coloured polka dot singlets I could find at - and this is where the vicious circle closes - trusty old Hennes and Mauritz.

What are your picks? Will you wait around for H&M's sneaky follow up "I STEALS EVERY DESIGN" (in zombie voice please) collection, like me? Are you over fashion blogs? Are you craving substance? Am I substantial enough?

Ugh, so many questions. I need a shower now.