March 26, 2012

Day 26: I got more than I bargained for

I was so excited to get the glitter nail polishes it was the first thing I did this morning, after the gym. Turns out they were sold out with everything but black, 1 bottle of gold and 1 bottle of awful red. I snatched a black and gold one but went a bit nuts in the bargain section - who could say no to brand nailpolish for 99 cents?

Revlon enamel in 913 Peach Nectar, L'oreal Resist & Shine in yellow, Sally Hansen Gem Crush in Glitz Gal and Big Money, Sally Hansen Xtreme wear in White on, Maybelline New York Mineral Blush in Soft Mauve

oooohhh. glitz.

I put the golden one on top of a very thin turquois base. Looks very mermaid-y, doesn't it?

I tried the Revlon Photoready mousse and was pretty disappointed. It's watery and sticky and doesn't give the great coverage it's supposed to give. Airbrush effect? Not really. And for forty dollars I would expect something that can at least compete with regular chemist brands.

I had a moment of realisation this morning, when a girl I thought couldn't be much older than me at the gym went to pick up her kid from child care.
I watched her as she stepped into the car with her baby on her arm, the windows full of 'my family'-stickers and for the first time I realised how FAR away from parenthood I still am (and so is Dan, thank fuck!). The reasons are quite simply: I am too selfish and too unfulfilled in terms of achievements and there's too much I want to do that simply isn't possible after you reproduce. There are things you can only do, when you have absolutely NO responsibility whatsover to anyone dependend on you. (a few examples for you: diving the great barrier reef during tiger shark season, sky diving, letting someone 'hack your iPhone' so your surprisingly professionally looking naked photos can leak and turn up everywhere, do porn and call it an 'art movie', apply for ANY reality show, open a shop, close a shop, try selling your selfmade shit on etsy, ...oh, the list is long!
Another thing I can't really get my head around is the fact, that parents seem to be on hallucinogens constantly. I present you with some proof here:
Things parents relate with parenthood:
  • baby smiles and makes me happy
  • baby smiles and makes me happy
  • baby smiles and makes me happy
  • baby smiles and makes me happy
Things everyone else relates to parenthood:
  • poo
  • vomit
  • foul smells
  • baby screaming
  • baby pissing on me
  • baby biting my nipples
  • baby making my tits saggy
  • baby making my belly flabby
  • baby stealing my sleep
  • baby stealing my sex life
  • baby wrecking my vagina
  • baby wrecking my bank account
  • baby wrecking my furniture
  • baby wrecking my wardrobe
Totally shouldn't think about reproducing any time soon.

an unbeatable combination.